Possibly the worst game of football this season, by either side, and between any two PL teams. Even worse than West Brom vs Stoke. I wonder why?
Some thought that the players’ minds may have been on their summer of fun on the beaches of Britain (they’ll holiday in Britain, right?), that joyous feeling of bliss as the sunburn of life meets the aftersun of an ice cold beer, and the ravages of a hearty season of football are allowed, temporarily at least, to recede in to the dark deep recesses of the mind, with just a casual look at Google Maps (or even an atlas – kids, ironically, you may have to Google ‘atlas’ to find out what one is) to see where our remote Europa League journey is going first.
Yes, could be that, and if that is how they’re feeling next Sunday, Chelsea will score 10. It may well be that they had half an eye on keeping their tinder dry for the Chelsea game. Or it may well be that the dreaded C word came to play. No, not that one, singular or plural (even though Koeman’s words about substituting the lot of them at half time might suggest he used that descriptive term to most if not all), but C is also for Complacency. You can’t even credit West Ham for snuffing out our threat, because for a start there was nothing to snuff out, and second, because they were as disjointed as we were.
Or it might just be that we were just plain awful. Not a single player can be praised, maybe a couple for workrate (and they were both substituted), but it was just dismal. So dismal in fact, that just like that shower of p**s yesterday, that I can’t even be bothered to write about it much.
Did we learn anything yesterday?
Yes. It’s an awful stadium to watch football. If we do nothing else with Bramley Moore Dock, we should get the architects to compare and contrast the Olympic London ‘appy ‘ammers Vodafone The New Upton Park Stadium, with the simply named Juventus Stadium in Italy, which ironically replaced a vast sprawling stadium with fans so far from the action they had to get a bus to the loo at half time, with a neat compact ‘in your face’ stadium where the fans are on top of the pitch and the atmosphere can be electric. Not a direct copy please as it only has a capacity just over 41,000, but certainly get us up to 50k as a starter with a plan B that can easily shift up the capacity if and when we need it. And don’t offer to stage athletics there in the Commonwealth Games in 2022.
So that’s about it I’m afraid. Nothing to write home about that game. Nothing to write about at all in fact.
On to Chelsea. Now, where’s my Factor 50…?